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Watching Your Spending

Someone monitors every transaction you make — tracking where you shop, what you buy, and how you spend money through shared bank accounts, linked cards, or transaction notifications.

What You Might Notice

  • The other person questions purchases they shouldn't know about

    They reference specific transactions from your account.

  • You feel unable to make any purchase without scrutiny

    Every dollar is monitored and questioned.

  • Transaction notifications are going to the other person's device

    Alerts for your spending are being received by them.

What You Can Do

  • Open a separate account for independent spending

    Even small amounts of independent money provide freedom.

  • Check notification settings on banking apps

    Remove the other person's device from transaction alerts.

  • Use cash for sensitive purchases when safe to do so

    Cash transactions don't create digital records.

Important: This resource provides general information, not personal advice. Every situation is different. The actions suggested here may not be safe in your specific circumstances — particularly if the person causing harm could notice changes to your devices or accounts. Always consider your physical safety first.

If you need personalised support, contact 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732) or your local specialist domestic violence service. If you are in immediate danger, call 000.

This framework is under active development. View full limitations & methodology.