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Be careful about discussing sensitive matters near your children's devices if you suspect monitoring. Consider whether devices given to children by the other parent may have monitoring enabled.
Someone may be using your child's devices to monitor you
Your ex-partner may have installed monitoring software or configured parental controls on your children's devices — not to protect the children, but to track your location, read your messages through the child, or monitor what happens in your home.
What You Might Notice
Your ex seems to know details about your home life they shouldn't know
Conversations, visitors, your schedule — information that could only come from inside your home.
The children's devices have parental monitoring you didn't set up
Check for apps like Life360, Find My, or other tracking/monitoring apps on devices provided by the other parent.
Your ex references your location when the children are with you
If they know where you went while the children had their devices, the devices may be tracking.
What You Can Do
Check children's devices for monitoring apps
Look for parental control apps, location sharing, and device administrator settings you didn't configure.
If you find monitoring, get advice before removing it — the other parent may be alerted.
Consider a separate device for sensitive communication
Keep important calls and messages off any device the children carry between homes.
Document and seek legal advice
Using children's devices for surveillance may violate family court orders and surveillance legislation.
Important: This resource provides general information, not personal advice. Every situation is different. The actions suggested here may not be safe in your specific circumstances — particularly if the person causing harm could notice changes to your devices or accounts. Always consider your physical safety first.
If you need personalised support, contact 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732) or your local specialist domestic violence service. If you are in immediate danger, call 000.
Using parental monitoring on children's devices to surveil an ex-partner's activities, location, and communications through the child. The child's device becomes a surveillance tool against the other parent. Distinct from Child Custody Tech Abuse (SAFE-T-0145) where the child is the target — here the child is the vector.
Mitigations for this technique are under development. If you have suggestions on how to improve this content, please submit a pattern.
Detection Indicators
ID
Detection Indicator
SAFE-D-0001
Anomalous Battery Consumption Device battery depletes faster than baseline due to continuous background data transmission.
SAFE-D-0002
Unexplained Data Usage Increased mobile data consumption without corresponding user activity. Monitor per-app data usage for unknown processes.
SAFE-D-0003
Device Temperature Anomalies Device runs hot during idle periods indicating background process activity.
SAFE-D-0004
Information Leakage Indicators Adversary demonstrates knowledge of private communications, locations, or activities accessible only through device monitoring.
SAFE-D-0005
Unknown Applications or Profiles Presence of unrecognised apps, device administrator privileges, or configuration profiles.
The TFA Matrix is a research framework under active development. Technique classifications, detection methods, and mitigations reflect current understanding and are subject to revision. This framework does not constitute forensic methodology, legal evidence standards, or clinical diagnostic criteria. Practitioners should apply professional judgement appropriate to their discipline and jurisdiction.